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Back to the time Brentley was in NICU

Back to the time Brentley was in NICU

Thursday, March 4, 2010

In desperate need of motivation, organization and self discipline!

So I woke up feeling a little blue this morning. I've realized I have "so MUCH to do" and little motivation to do it. Being a new mommy is such a blessing but exhausting too. I was never a great house keeper and now I'm even worse! Things have started to literally pile up around me and I feel like I am in over my head! I'm sure it's just because I am so exhausted and sleep deprived that my list of "to do's" seems impossible, overwhelming and daunting.
I've made personal decisions to try to live cleaner, get more scheduled, become more organized in my personal life and practice self discipline with my nutrional choices. Well, part of me wants to say "That's for the birds!" Living by a list of "I shoulds" only stresses me out and makes me want to give up! BUT such a huge part of me wants all of this to work too! How do I do it?? I know Brentley would and could benefit from a more strict schedule, but how do I change the "fly by the seat of my pants" part of my personality to one of more discipline? It goes against everything that I've ever been. I've always liked the unpredictableness that I am. But it seems to make my life less caotic I need some organization. I know, I know, I need to start one day at a time and just get what can be done in one day completed, but I've got a bit of a lazy streak in me too when it comes to organizing my personal life. I'm not sure if it comes from knowing there is so much I want organized and accomplished or if it is purely laziness on my part. I can say ,honestly, it's probably a little of both. I like my days of "rest" and feel so much lately that I haven't had that, so when they come along I spend the day doing NOTHING. Then of course Monday comes and I'm like "why didn't I do things around the house, get something small done?!"
So to say the least I have some need for motivation! I'm working on self talk and encouragement to get this "list of shoulds" done. I'll let you know how it goes.
So my goals for the next few days?
~ Make a concious effort to ENJOY each day and the challenges it brings, otherwise life just wizzes by in miserable mode and what's the fun in that?
~ Make healthier eating habit choices- I tried starting South Beach but that takes lots of preparation so instead I will just make wiser choices each meal for now. Then as I get more organized move toward South Beach.
~CLEAN and ORGANIZE one room of the house each evening
~Finish the taxes
~Get the Thank you cards that are written sent out!!
~ Get Brentley back on a sleep/feeding schedule! I think if she would just sleep the night through everything wouldn't seem so daunting!

Okay, so those are too great of goals are they? I have to allow myself to know I CAN NOT be perfect, but I can sure do my best at reaching those goals! Okay so, seriously, now that I've completed my own treatment plan, I will re-evaluate in a few days/weeks and see what I've been able to accomplish.