1st blog and parenthood

Well, I have blogged once or twice before, but there's something about "spilling my guts" to the internet world of strangers that seems a little daunting to me, yet some what intriguing. I like writing and like to use words in places where they usually don't belong. I'm pretty random in my thought patterns and tend to ramble on about things most people don't care about, or at least pretend to care about. Side note: It's also quite daunting because there are several audiences that read blogs be it Sunday School friends, Church friends, relatives, co-workers, strangers and (hopefully no clients) with such there comes a sense of "editing" my thoughts. Though It doesn't have to be a journal per-say- it often feels as such with most blogs I've read and when I write, often it's an organization of my thoughts.

So if you are simply pretending to care or really do care read.

The last weeks in life have been pretty eventful and in many ways unrestful. I've had to take Brentley to the hospital in the event she was oxygen deprived. It was quite scary- seeing my 3 month old daughter gasping for air and having an anxious panic look on her face. I felt helpless.

They admitted her to place her on oxygen and breathing treatments. It was discouraging to say the least. She progressed in health quickly though and we were able to take her off oxygen- see how she did and then because she stabilized, we were able to take her home again the following evening. I had about one hour of sleep the whole time. It doesn't help that I've had nightmares about finding her in her crib dead. I'm rebuking that! I'm anxiously attached to the sweet baby. I still have her in our room and making moves to try to move her into her crib, but it's really hard for me. Dr. says she needs her own space... I'm sure she does, I''m sure I do, but, I think that she will be in her own room in her own time and when (probably more realistically) I and Justin are ready. Anyway, I'm thankful and praising God for her recovery and for the much needed rest I WAS able to get. Parenthood is already such an adventure. I love it, but with it comes a host of emotions I don't think anyone could have prepared me for! Well, rest is begging me to indulge and I must give in to it's plea.